I don't remember the last time I made a post on here. I guess at least towards the end of last year. AT LEAST. And the truth of the matter is, while I do still maintain blogs, I'm just not interested in this journaling interface much anymore. Not for personal blogging--I do still post fanfiction and shit here.

Probably the biggest reason for that is I prefer paper journaling for personal thoughts and feelings jotting.

That said, I do maintain other blogs. I don't use tumblr for blogging much these days, but I do have Wordpress blogs.

This one is for my meta. My fandom meta, which is...pretty much Gundam Wing meta (especially if you look at the name and URL), but I could easily use it for other fandoms. If I had any. I have three more :one I don't use much (if at all), one is a "safe space" blog (which I won't link), and one is kind of an original fiction story thing.

Unfortunately, there really isn't anywhere I post my personal thoughts and what not anymore. Mostly because I do the handwritten journal thing. I've kind of tried to step back a little bit on what personal things I share on the internet nowadays as I've gotten older and my name has gotten out there a bit more (as Karu Maxwell). So yeah.

I'm not going to delete this journal or LJ or anything. But don't really expect much in the way of posting on here. Most of the time I'm just too busy to jot down blog posts like I used to do in my younger years. If Dreamwidth had a mobile app I might, in fact, use it more. I know LJ has one, but I prefer DW to LJ. Wordpress has a nicely crafted app and that's what I use the most.

My life is basically fandom and...helping out some friends atm. There really isn't much of interest to write about.

~*~

THAT SAID, in case anyone forgot, my birthday was on Monday. I turned 23. I know there are some of you who've known me since I was like, thirteen or fourteen. Time sure passes by, doesn't it?

I'm not entirely sure who reads this anymore (if anyone in fact does) since I don't post much (if at all) for months at a time. My blogging platform is mostly Plurk (tumblr is more for reblogging fandom things). I guess I can give an overview of what's been going on.

FIRSTLY, I am sick with a cold that just will not die. I had to call out of work yesterday because I ended up being sick all of the night before. That was not a fun experience.

SECOND, work has been...well. There's interesting shit going down. We're down a store manager (though his return is imminent, he's been out for a month and a half, maybe two months) because he had an unfortunate accident involving a horse. Our previous co-manager had to leave due to kidney failure, and our current co-manager is a real piece of work (who will probably butt heads with Store Manager when he comes back oho). Lots of changes. According to DW the last time I wrote about work was August 2012, when I first got into cash office. Well. Barbara is still her crazy self and it got to the point where I had to write a letter to my boss about what was happening. That was May of this year, and she seemed to tone down a bit...until about a month ago, and now she's worse than ever. She has twice now punched walls in the office, and she threw a register bag at Donna, so yeah. I keep my boss updated on what Barbara does...and she keeps me updated on what Barbara does behind my back, which led to 19th October where my boss pulled me aside and point blank said, "Barbara's trying to start shit again." Because Barbara apparently finds it perfectly acceptable for her to be on her cell phone taking personal calls on the clock, but if I send one text message it's the end of the world.

We are not amused. SO I BASICALLY PROMISED MYSELF that the next time Barbara was on the phone, I'd nail her ass. Which is what I did today. A couple of days ago, I started drafting a letter to Corporate. I'm not fucking around anymore. You want to play games? Fine. But I play to win.

THIRD, I am currently an intern at a publication newsletter thing. Right now I do article write ups and things like research and fun things like that. If all goes well (and I'm being cautiously optimistic at the moment), it could lead to something paid, which is great because I'd essentially be paid to write, and you all know that that's pretty much what I want. CAUTIOUS OPTIMISM.

I don't really do the whole "blogging" thing much anymore--I've switched to journaling solely for myself, so I use a paper journal, which I find better anyway. It's kind of how I found myself and started trying to get my shit together, and it's been almost a year now since I decided to "seek answers" as I call it. Having a name for your various problems helps because now you know what you're dealing with has a name and it's not just all in your imagination. But now it's even scarier because now you need to figure out what the fuck you have to do. For some of the things (such as my borderline personality disorder and my bipolar disorder and my anxiety) writing is great for me, it's a great outlet and it helps so much at figuring out exactly what's going on inside my head...

But it doesn't hurt to, you know, post here once in a while about things. In my high school years I used LJ and DW extensively and now I barely touch the things except for my fanfiction community.

I GOT SMASH BROS 3DS and because I am trash and utterly predictable I still main Marth because why not.

I'M DOING NANOWRIMO AGAIN THIS YEAR after last year's win I'm pumped to start this year with yet another Gundam Wing fic that will probably kick everyone in the feels. (When do my fics not kick people in the feels?)

But yeah. There's my life update. Really not much exciting shit is going on.

Deleted the majority of my Fire Emblem fic. (It was all Elibe stuff.) I left the Archanea stuff because I still have attachments to Archanea and that's some of my best stuff for FE, so that can stay.

The rest of it I let go.

I had 116 stories, now I'm down to 80. There's still more I may get rid of.

I will not touch Gundam Wing, Weiss Kreuz, or Smash Brothers stuff (unless the Smash Brothers stuff is really terrible). I will never delete Melee Academy. Even after all these years, it's still one of my babies.

All of my Fire Emblem Elibe stuff is gone. You can find it still on Dearest Disclaimer, but it's off my FFN account. Most of my Zelda stuff is gone or going as I get reviews for things.

In the past I was wary to get rid of things because of sentimental attachment, because of the amount of reviews, because of whatever. I still have copies of these things, it's not like I'm deleting them forever, so it's easier to let things go. And if someone is disappointed, they can still read these things. Just not on my FFN account. My FFN account is for things that I'm especially proud of that I want the public to see (that isn't just smut).

I'll have fics to post in the future on FFN to replace the ones I got rid of.

Nope. No apologies. I do have PMs from people asking where things went, if FFN deleted these things or if I did. It was all me. I couldn't look at these things anymore. I'm not coming back to those fandoms, I'm not updating/revising these things, and the only way to drive that point home is to nuke it.

Yep.

I feel a lot better now.

I kind of suck at updating this thing, don't I? Mostly because I forget about it, despite remembering that I post fanfiction on here. I still journal, just in an actual journal because a lot of my thoughts lately are too private to share anymore and if I posted half of these things I'd have to explain certain things.

And on my plurk which is limited to just my support group (basically) consisting of my girlfriend and my Tag Family I'm trying to figure out how to explain said thing. I won't talk about it here ever probably because everyone knows I'm crazy to begin with we do not need to have you think that I'm really crazy or something like that.

Often on here I don't know what to talk about because I have a tumblr where I do my fandom thing and then I have plurk where I...do my RP and fandom thing. (And I RP on tumblr as well.)

What have I been up to lately? Nothing all that exciting. I opened up fic requests (which will be closing on Monday). Contemplating signing up for Camp NaNo in April, but I don't know. I recently posted one of the finished requests over on my fic DW, which I don't think anyone here will be interested in because it's Gundam Wing.

Well no wait I lied because I have Dusty on here (and Plurk, and Tumblr...). He would care. ASIDE FROM HIM THOUGH.

I've wanted to kind of use this thing for meta purposes or something but I either do that stuff on tumblr (surprise, surprise) or Plurk because it's also Gundam Wing related (what a surprise). And I don't think anyone on here (excepting Dusty) cares about my thoughts on Heero and whatever so that's why it's on tumblr (where my followers are into Gundam Wing) or plurk (where everyone is in that fandom as well).

So I still have no idea what the hell to use this journal for. I guess if there's anything people want me to talk about I could always make a post or something.

Like maybe when I'm not a lazy asshole I'll do a write up (with pictures) of my Gundam Wing bluray box sets, but ideally I want to wait until I get my Endless Waltz one so I can make a thing and keep it all together. I don't know. Maybe if I can get through a formal write-up of the audio commentary without bogging it down with all the fanboying and shit, I can do a proper write up.

(How do you expect me to do a proper write-up of something where they spend 90 percent of a 24 minute episode making fun of Zechs' mask, Treize's fashion sense, and the fact that Koyasu Takehito forgot Zechs had a sister?)

Besides that, I can put as many images as I want in a post (whereas I have a photo upload limit on tumblr) and I promised Hiiro when I ordered the box sets that I'd take pics and do a write up so I really should do that at some point. I'll probably post it here and just link it on tumblr since that would be the easiest thing to do, and then just tag her on tumblr for it.

I planned on doing meta for a while but I...ended up forgetting >.> beginning of last month I celebrated eleven years in Gundam Wing fandom and I wanted to do something special for it and I never did so I don't know. I might do that at some point. Who knows.

anyway yeah that's about it for this entry I guess. I know, not really a lot to say compared to have I used to be, posting thousands of words daily but my life isn't all that exciting and Plurk and Tumblr have spoiled me so I really don't have the attention span anymore to be sat on a chair typing up meta posts and stuff. Maybe that'll change. Who knows.

Maybe one day I will bore you all half to death with meta about teenage boys who wear spandex shorts or something idk.